Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
Randomize
