you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
