Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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