he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
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