We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
