I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize