Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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