i just identified you from a description of your pipe
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize
