you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
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