I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Randomize
