I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Randomize
