Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
