went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize