saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
