dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
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