So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
