I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
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