Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..