i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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