you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize