if i can run in heels then i can drive
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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