The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Randomize
