We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's not a foreskin expert like you
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
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