i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
