Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
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