May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
