Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize