R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
i need an iv and a liver transplant
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Randomize
