Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
Randomize
