Already got asked if we're dating
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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