and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize