if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
Randomize
