That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize