It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
I'm way too hungover for life right now
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Randomize
