He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize
