Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Randomize
