She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
