I like to think it a success when the cops are called
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
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