My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize