jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
