Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
Randomize