Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
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