My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
