I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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