but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
