So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Randomize