So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
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