She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
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