Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
