just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
He? As in you personified your dick?
Randomize
